My Epiphany

As I sit here in the quiet glow of those days after Christmas...those days when the hustle bustle is over and the peace and  joy of what just happened is more evident than any of those days leading up to it...I ponder the meaning of it all.

I always want to make Advent meaningful and somehow the commercialism and the hustle bustle seem to get in the way.  From the decorating that begins the day after Thanksgiving to the cards that I want to get out the beginning of December, that never seem to get out until a few days before Christmas.  From the gift selections to the baking and back again, to the gift selections that don't seem quite right and need to be returned and another purchased.  From the laundry and cleaning that still need to be done during this time to the parties to prepare for or go to.  And, don't forget the wrapping of those gifts and other odds and ends that find their way into the Christmas mix. Somehow, all of these things get in the way of "preparing the way" for Christmas.

It is the quiet days after Christmas that fill me with the "presence" of the infant Jesus and the man Jesus, of long ago. The Christmas Story is a beautiful one; one of hope and promise.  Yet, it is the Jesus that walked this earth, teaching us about peace, hope, joy, compassion, forgiveness, equality, inclusiveness, justice and love, that I really want to focus on and follow. So, maybe I am not so far off in waiting until the "dust settles", to allow it all to sink deep into my being.  To feel His breath within me, as I breathe.  There is something powerful about this quiet, that waits for the world to be quiet before it revels itself.  Maybe that is why the Wise Men waited until Epiphany to go and adore Him by bringing gifts.   Maybe we have it backwards.  Maybe we should do the commercial Christmas that seems to have overtaken our modern world, and then really celebrate with the Wise Men on Epiphany.  I think I will make Epiphany my new day to celebrate and adore Him.  I am glad it is on a Sunday this year and will be celebrated within the Mass.

 Epiphany means to have an "enlightened realization, allowing something to be understood from a new and deeper perspective".  I like this definition. I like the idea that maybe I have understood Christmas from a new and deeper perspective this year.  May Jesus revel himself to you this year in a new and deeper way. 

'Tis The Season for Making Memories

I don't think there is a time of the year that I treasure more than Christmas.  It is filled with memory making opportunities are every turn.

When Ron and I got married, we packed our family traditions and brought them with us.  Of course, there was some compromising to be done.  I opened my presents at Midnight on Christmas Eve.  To him, that was totally wrong.  Christmas morning was the time to open presents.  So, we compromised. We open one small gift, on Christmas Eve and our children were allowed to do the same. With grand-children, they are given that opportunity too.  But, just one.

Another tradition was going to Mass. Now that I was an official Catholic, going to Mass Christmas Eve seemed like the thing to do.  Plus, in those early years, we would go "home" on Christmas Day, so this allowed us time for Mass and time to make the trip home in the morning. How we loved walking from our little apartment to our church that was...probably, 6-7 large city blocks away.  I remember so clearly, being bundled up with heavy winter coats, scarves, gloves, hats and anything else that might keep us warm.  I remember, with a smile on my face, how we would stop on every man hole cover along the way and feel the warmth of the steam rising from them and then hurry along our way.  It was so very special, walking home along the same path and knowing we were creating our family traditions.

Through the years, that tradition changed as children came along.  Going to Mass is one of those traditions that will always remain, no matter where or how our family changes.  From going to Midnight Mass as newly married, to Christmas morning with small children, to Midnight Mass with teenagers and young adults to the Children's Mass at 4:00 PM with grand-children.  Whether it is watching a toddler walk down the aisle, all decked out in a red sequined hat and scarf to the front row or watching a jet-lagged six year old sleep through it all.  Whether it is watching an infant asleep in his carrier on his first Christmas Eve or watching him toddle up the aisle this year.  No matter when we go, it is where our Christmas is rooted.  In the love and hope and peace of that first Christmas.

A big tradition we have is one I brought into our family.  The only one I treasured as a child.  One that made me feel very special.  My family would place my baby rattle on our tree, as the very first ornament to go on.  We brought that into our family and as each child left home, got married and started their own traditions, their baby rattle went with them.  Ron was the only one who didn't have one over the years and one year Tara surprised him with his very own.  It is easy to see it is not of the 1943 circa, but it is very special to him.  Needless to say, there were a few tears shed that year.

Other traditions that we have always had and have remained, are our Advent Wreath and candles.  Each child would have their chance to light the candles.  It was a big deal in our house when they were growing up.  It has remained so for Ron and I.  We still light the candles, even if it is just the two of us.  Another, is the Nativity.  Our first one, was a small music box with just three angels and the baby Jesus.  We bought it at Kaufmann's Department Store in downtown Pittsburgh.  It still sits on a shelf, albeit with one angel's head glued and another angel's wing missing.  Our next one was one we made in a ceramic class.  One year Ron built a fairly large stable for us, out of weathered oak from my parent's garage.  It wasn't large enough to hold the 3 pieces we had made in that ceramic class, so we made a smaller set, that grew to include shepherds, wise men, angels and animals.  That is the one that was the "center piece".  However, many others have followed and you can find one in almost every room of our house.  Many are from countries where Tara has lived.

Over the years, coming home from Mass has changed, but since the kids have been adults, creating their own traditions, we come home to share a simple meal and sit around the tree with a warm fire in the fireplace.  This year, a toddler will open his first gift on Christmas Eve at Nana and Granda's.  The best part of a child joining in, is that some traditions will remain and others will change.  Change is good.  Traditions that remain are good.  It is all good and all building memories.

To memories that remain and memories that grow, and those that change
.

Pumpkin Patch

Of course, we know that Augie is far to young to even know what a  pumpkin is and we also know that taking him to the "pumpkin patch" is for us, more than him.  But golly, it is fun anyway and we will have lots of pictures and stories to tell him about our trip the other day.  We are creating memories, and isn't that really what all these little adventures are about?

He looks like he is definitely on the hunt for that perfect pumpkin.

And Nana is looking for that perfect photo op without injuring the poor child. Note that she is hanging onto his little butt.

This one might work Nana.

Nah, let's keep looking.

I think I found the perfect one Nana and I can carry it all by myself.  Yep, this one is perfect.  Do you think we can come back here in December and see what they have?  

It was a fun afternoon, making memories, filling our hearts with the wonder of a small child.  

The Artist

Sojo is a very unique little girl  She never ceases to amaze me with her creativity and little mind that weaves in   and out of being sporty with her soccer and baseball and on to being creative with art and simply having fun with games on her IPad or playing with her friends.

Last summer, we gave her a book titled "My Little Orsay".  It is a book geared to children her age and takes several pieces of art, in which the goal is to go to the Musee d'Orsay in Paris and find these pieces.  And that we did.  It was so much fun to see this Musee in a much different way than we did some 17 or so years ago when we first visited it.  We stood in line with the knowledge that we would be seeing it through Sojo's eyes.  So, we each set out to find the pieces of art.  The one I found was the "red dog" by Paul Gauguin.  It is actually titled, Arearea,   was painted in 1891 in Tahiti and I guess not well received. We certainly liked it though.   It is said that it represents where dream and reality coexist.  I think that is a good way to express oneself through art.

As Sojo would walk from room to room with us finding each piece along the way, she would often find a chair and sit down; taking out her sketch pad and doing some drawing of her own.

  

    

The finished product...a family portrait of us all in front of the Eiffel Tower.  Note the bird...which was in the original photo that she used as her muse. 

It was one of those days that left an imprint on my heart that will forever remain and bless me at every thought it brings.  

We Will Always Have Paris

Our week in Paris with the "E" family sure flew by.  It almost seemed the arrived and left on the same day.  But, my oh my, we had a grand time.

Sometimes, I had to pinch myself to make sure it wasn't all a dream.  When Tara was born almost 45 years ago, I certainly never thought about spending a week with her and her family in Paris.  My greatest dream for her was to simply be a healthy and happy little girl.  To grow up in a happy and healthy home filled with the kind of love that would nurture her and provide her with the tools she would need to grow into a happy and healthy woman.  I looked at that sweet baby girl and thought about all the opportunities she would have to grow up to be anything she wanted to be.  Unlike my life, being told I could or could not do something because I was a "girl".  I knew this little girl would never be told that.  She might not be able to do something for other reasons, but NEVER would being a female keep her from anything.  My prayer, hope, dream was, that being a female would only open more doors for her.  

And so, she did.  She has been able to follow her dreams and has allowed them to take her far beyond anything I ever dreamed of.  She has traveled to more cities, countries and continents than I ever dreamed she would.  I simply wanted her to get an education and have a career that supported her dreams and provided for her in an adequate fashion financially.  When she went off to Ecuador over 20 years ago, I remember her saying to me, "Mom, don't worry, I am going for one year, two at the most".  I have watched her disappear through departure gates and security gates and on this trip,I watched her and her husband and daughter walk away from me down a narrow Paris street in the early morning golden glow of the street lights.  It looked like something out of a movie.  They had planned to walk to St. Germain de Pres and catch a taxi to the airport, but a taxi came by on Rue du Dragon and stopped.  When I saw them begin to put their suitcases into the taxi, I couldn't restrain myself.  I needed one last hug this time.  I couldn't just watch them disappear again without another hug.  As I began to run and at my age, that can be a challenge, but I felt an energy that I didn't know I had.  Suddenly, I see them all in the taxi but Dale and I called out to him to wait.  I sprinted those last few steps and leaned into the taxi to give my little girl and her little girl one last hug.  Tears are filling my eyes as I write.  Will I ever get used to saying goodbye?  I don't think so.  I am so blessed.  I have a daughter who wants to be with me and her father.  She wants to share her daughter and husband with us.  She wants to share as much time as she can with us.  It isn't always easy, but she finds a way.  Why can't I just let go of the emptiness I feel when she leaves?  It is a challenge, but I have made progress over the years.  I no longer get moody the day before she leaves.  I cherish the moments we have and don't waste time on that loss I feel.  I look forward to planning the next time we will all be together.

And so, the empty and hollow feeling comes and goes.  I can't stop it.  But, I can work with it and not allow it to control how we roll with it.  We make the most of our times together and we are so blessed by it.  And goodness gracious, who can complain about trips to places like Paris to meet and explore the streets, museums, metros, gardens, monuments, bakeries and cafes?  Whenever I feel blue and whenever we talk about it or whenever we think about our times together, our new phrase to one another is, "we will always have Paris".  Yes, my sweet and beautiful daughter, "we will always have Paris" and all the other ordinary moments of life.  We are blessed beyond measure.

Paris...Through The Eyes of a Child

We all were in agreement that we had to plan this trip around Sojo's likes and dislikes and interests.  We  had been here before, so anything we saw or did, was simply icing on the cake to us.  And so it was, seeing Paris through the eyes of Sojo.

The "E" family arrived around 10:30 am from an overnight flight from Bahrain.  They pretty much threw their bags in the bedroom and off we went.  No time to dilly dally.  The first day, we just scoped out the area, finding the local bakery, Carrefour (grocery store where we could get cheese and wine), the Metro, etc. The area of Rue du Dragon was perfect, just one half block from St. Germain des Pres. This brought the Metro close, as well as Cafes and Brasseries close by; like Brasserie Lipp, Cafe Flores and Les Deux Magots, where literary giants of the world hung out after WWII. We didn't eat at any of the ones mentioned.  They were too crowded.  We did however got to Cafe Louise, which was right beside Brasserie Lipp and quite good.  Tara and Dale snuck away a couple of times for a glass of wine and dessert, listening to some jazz as well. 

Favorite Sight:  the Eiffel Tower.  It was quite a cool day and very cloudy, even a bit of drizzle.  It didn't dampen our enthusiasm, though we might have climbed up it if it had been warmer.  The carousel wasn't even running that day because of the damp chill in the air.  Sojo loved it and just seeing it was probably just enough for her.  She drew a beautiful picture of all of us in front of it.  She even included the pigeon who photo bombed our actual photograph of the family. 

Favorite Mode of Transportation:  Probably, the Metro...quick, easy, cheap and always a surprise.

Favorite Bookstore(and there are many):  Shakespeare & Company.  

Most Unusual Sightings:

Favorite Musee: the Musee d'Orsay.  This was a must visit for the trip.  We had given Sojo a book during the summer to prepare her for the trip.  She is so much the artist, that we thought the book was a perfect way to introduce her to Paris Museums.  We personally, from our experience here, thought that the Louvre was a bit over the top...too big, too busy, too many people everywhere.  Maybe when she comes back to Paris.  We had been to the M'O and thought it perfect for everyone from 7-70.  She loved it.  She brought her book called "My Little Orsay" which highlighted several pieces.  We walked around and found several of them.  She sat a couple of times drawing her impressions.  And when she was ready, we left.  Just enough for everyone. 

Favorite Jardin/Park:  jardin l'acclimation.   This particular garden is technically outside Paris; on the fringes.  Friends that Tara and Dale worked with in Shanghai, now work in Paris.  He is the Head Master/Principal at a school and she is a stay at home Mom.  They have a daughter who is Sojo's age and the girls played together in Shanghai as toddlers.  It was a super fun day for Sojo in the jardin/park, playing on the playgrounds, riding rides, seeing farm animals and just doing what kids do...run, jump, laugh and giggle.

Favorite Unusual Sighting:  Zombies on the Metro.  Yep, you heard it right. Zombies on the Metro.

Favorite foods:  Bread, cheese, wine, macarons, Croque Monsieur (a delightful open faced sandwich...rustic bread, a slice of ham, a slice of cheese and then toasted under a broiler).

Favorite  cafe:  Cesar Paris Ristoranti Italian .  The best pizza and bruschetta in the world. In the world.

We did it all, "just like Bogie and Bacall".  A cruise on the River Seine, the largest flea market in Europe, figuring out the Metro system and squeezing in at the last minute, miles of walking, lighting candles in Cathedrals, Basilicas and Churches on corners, watching Mimes on Montmartre, Shakespeare and Company Bookstore and visiting another playground in Luxembourg Gardens. 

We put over 10,000 steps on daily and Sojo was a trooper.  Rarely, did she complain and only once or twice did she asked to be carried.  She slept through a couple of lunches and the River Seine cruise.  It was a lot of fun seeing Paris with a child of seven.  I can't think of a better way to do it.

I Love Paris in the Springtime...I Love Paris in the Fall

Having been here in the spring and now the fall, I can honestly say that.  However, this fall, is a wee bit cooler than I would like.  The rain is intermittent and seems only drizzly, but it does make for a bit of a challenge for pictures and comfort.  Every time we see the sun peek through and a window of blue appears, I want to shout out for joy. 

I don't know what it is about Paris that attracts me.  Much of it is the history.  I have seen only one semi-modern building that seemed so out of place.  You look at the height and the materials used and you are in awe at it all.  We saw one building with scaffolding and you could see they were not changing it, but restoring it.  That is one of the many things I love about this city.  They cherish their history and preserve it.  And those of us that have the opportunity to see it all, are so blessed. 

Just down the street; maybe 3 doors down, is a plaque that made us realize just how blessed we are to be here and to notice things and people who were here before us.  Just as we were setting out that first day, Dale and I were chatting about our love of Les Miserables and Tara looks up and sees this sign.  

Just what are the chances of something like that?  Victor Hugo, the author of Les Miserables lived here.  He didn't write it until 1862, but I am sure he was thinking about it when he was living on this street.  I know that I have literary thoughts running through my head right now.  Blessed?  We sure are.

Bitter Sweet...

Today, was our last day as full-time caregivers for Augie.  Our 10 hours a day, 5 days a week gig is up.  It is a bitter sweet feeling in my heart right now.  Yes, this was a hard gig and it was exhausting for two "older than the normal" grandparents.  Yet, it was so much fun and what a blessing.  Getting to be with this little guy on Fridays since last November and then 5 days a week for the last 6.5 weeks, has been more than we ever expected.  More exhausting, more fun, more educational and my goodness gracious, we have laughed so hard sometimes, tears ran down our faces.  His little antics, his laughter, his joy, his changing right before our eyes.  We have watched him go from a tiny baby into this little independent boy who is walking and talking.  Okay, the talking is babble, but we know, he knows exactly what he is saying and we know it is important stuff.

And so, tomorrow he turns one year old and he is walking.  His daycare requirements are those two things.  You cannot keep a busy boy like him from turning one and walking.  So, next week, we leave on a 3 week trip to see Sojo who will be turning 7 and Augie starts daycare.  When we get back, we will still have him 2 days a week. Thank goodness for that.  I am not sure we are ready to hand him over to anyone but his parents more days than that.

And so, that assignment that we chose to take on in August...  Thank you Sean and Katherine for entrusting your most precious little boy with us.  It has been one heck of a ride.  We are so grateful for having had this time with him.  Our greatest prayer is that we have done a good job and have somehow left a positive imprint on his little heart.  Someday, we hope that he stops at the sound of a bird and thinks of his Granda.  Someday, we hope he puts his hand into a water fountain and as the water drips down his hand, he thinks of his Nana.  Someday, we hope he wonders why these things mean so much to him. We hope that he somehow knows that these are special things we did with him and that is why he stops when he hears a bird or hears the sound of water in a fountain.  We know that we will never hear a bird sing or a water fountain flowing without our hearts fluttering.

Happy 1st Birthday, little man.  Where did the time go...

Why We Tell Our Stories

My creative juices were flowing recently, as I tried to re-create that creativity from a few years back when I made Sojo a birthday banner.  Since Augie will soon be one year old, I thought I should get busy and make him one.  I also wanted to make him a birthday crown.  Here is a preview of part of it.

I had a lot of fun re-creating the birthday banner and fun with the new birthday crown.  I hope that both find their way into every birthday celebration for years to come.  The picture shows just a piece of the banner, which says, "Happy Birthday Augie" along with a banner with the numbers 1-10 to do iron on pics of his birthdays from age one through ten.  A friend, did the embroidery work.  I did all of the sewing.  It is just like Sojo's, except for different fabric and I used iron on felt letters and numbers for hers.  They are not perfect, but as Mother Teresa says, "we cannot all do great things, but we can do small things with great love".  There is great love in every stitch.  I can't wait to see it hanging on the wall each year for his birthdays, just like I can't wait to see Sojo's soon for her 7th birthday.  The time goes by so quickly and memories are all we have of these fleeting moments in time.  It gives me great pleasure to be a part of these moments...celebrating the gift of life.  Augie won't remember his first birthday, but the pictures will be a recording of it and our memories will be told to him year after year.  One day, he will tell us the stories, as if they were his very own memories.  That is why we tell our stories.  For others to remember...

Nana's Boot Camp, aka, Kindermusik

Well, we are 5.5 weeks into our assignment of watching Augie 5 days a week, while Mama and Daddy work.  The daycare that Mama and Daddy have chosen doesn't take little ones until they are one year old and walking.  So, we have been doing lots of walking and getting closer to the birthday.

In order to help pass the time, I thought that maybe a local music class might help us out. So, off we went take a trial class and immediately registered the little one.  I would love to share some pictures, but the privacy of the other little ones prevents me from doing so  Here is a website in case anyone wants to check it out.  I highly recommend it.  http://musicalsteps.yourvirtuoso.com/components/CourseInfo.html?curriculumId=1835

Now about this "Nana's Boot Camp".  I am the only grandmother there.  This is a class of infants and young mothers.  There are infants from the age of about 4 months to about 16 months in Augie's class. I am guessing most parents are in their 20's and 30's.  Granda went along the first week and plans to help out again next week. It is a 45 minute class and there is lots of music and movement, if you know what I mean.  I am either running after to Augie to make sure he is "gentle" when he wants to touch one of his little friends, or I am picking him up and swinging him or bouncing him to the music.

The name of the class is "Feathers", so one would expect soft tweeting, right?  And, there are lots of bird like songs.  Lots of tweeting and singing. However, the genre of the music varies.  It is exposing him to all kinds of sounds and beats. There are drums, shakers and bubbles with scarves flying.  Augie loves it.  From the moment we open the door and I put him down on the floor, he is happy and joyful.  I wish I had a picture of him to share. He immediately runs over to the drums on the floor and starts his own beat.  He loves the other children and smiles all the time.  You are given your own CD of the music as part of the fee and if I play it at the house, he immediately turns and recognizes the tune.  His little body begins to move.

To say it is not a challenge for a 67 year old grandmother to lift this 23 pound+ little guy and swing him, lift him, chase him and dance with him, would be a lie.  It is definitely a physical challenge.  He falls asleep in the car on the way home and I am right behind him as soon as I place him gently in his bed.  But, to not share that this is a highlight of my week to watch his joy and love for music, would be a disservice to this happy little guy and the program.  He is so energetic, so in-tune with the beat, so interested in other children and the music around him.  He is loved by all as he weaves his way in between the other parents and children. The director and team of this program are so professional and you can see they love what they do.  We are registered for another 7 week session, which will take us into November.  We will see if I have any strength for more after that.  Until then, we will enjoy watching this precious little guy explore new things and make new friends and grow into a boy who enjoys and appreciates music.

Just thinking...in one week, this little guy will be one year old and here he is, spilling joy wherever he goes.

Our Word Is Love

We went to a funeral today.  It was not a somber event.  It was a celebration of a great man's life shared through the Eucharist and the sharing of his family's love and devotion. 

I don't remember the exact date that I met this man, but it was many years ago -- close to 14 or 15, I would guess.  We began going to a new church on the eas tside of Tucson.  We had received a card in the mail telling us we were within the parish boundaries and that the first Mass would be held in a local grade school. We were curious and a bit weary of our present church.  Plus, we have always been "parish boundary" people -- feeling like we should be where God calls us to be.

One of the early blessings of this church for us,  was meeting this man and his wife.  They were so instrumental in this new church, that early conversations around their coffee table, in their home is where this church was conceived.  With the local Bishop's invitation and blessing, mind you.  From the moment you met them, you knew they were God's Grace wrapped up in a big red bow. He was Irish and she was Italian.  What a beautiful mix of spirit.  He with his tall, powerful presence and sense of humor that always brought a smile or laughter.  She with her soft, but powerful presence, that made you instantly sense, she was a woman to be recogned with.  When I say "powerful", I don't mean in a status kind of way. Indeed not. Though they were both highly educated and successful, they were also down to earth and no nonsense people.  Their power came in the knowledge that they knew right from wrong and were not shy to tell you about it. You learned early on what social justice meant to these two. 

He was a dentist who provided free dental care to the poverty stricken of our city one day every month throughout his career and even into retirement.  He provided free dental care to all clergy and religious who came to him.  He was a devoted and loving husband for 58 years and attributed his wife to teaching him about love.  He was the father to six biological children and one son from Sudan whom they called and treated like their own. They mirror his love and devotion to his faith.  He was Papa to 18 grandchildren who adored him.  It was easy to see in their faces and the words spoken that Papa was adored and cherished and will be greatly missed.  They too mirror his love of God and of all.  He has left a legacy of love. 

Together, this man and his wife have given over and over and over to the poor in so many ways.  Ministering to the Lost Boys of Sudan and Refugees from Iraq, as well as the local poor. They were not afraid to make an appointment with the local Bishop and tell him he wasn't doing enough.   When you were around them, you knew you should do more and you knew you could.  I have often told her how "I want to be like you when I grow up". 

They most special part of this service was when several of their grandchildren spoke together about their Papa.  They told us about a Christmas in the 80's when their Papa wrote something an placed it on the fridge forever more because it was his gift to them.  To make a long story short, it was a simple gift.  He talked about love and what it meant and ended with "in our house, the word is love".  That really left an impression on me.  Of course, we all think that our word is love, but how often do we stop and really give it thought and how often do we remind those we love about it.  And how often is our word, not love?  I plan to share this story with our kids and remind them that "our word is love" and the word in their homes should always be "love" to.  I hope the "love" is the word in your house too.

Near and Far

THIS WAS WRITTEN A COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO AND SOMEHOW NEVER GOT POSTED.  I DON'T LIKE TO POST TWO IN ONE DAY, BUT AM AFRAID IT WILL NEVER GET POSTED IF I DON'T,,,,

I have longed to be a grandmother for a very long time.  While my friends were having them left and right in their forties and fifties, I had to wait until I was sixty for my first.  That would be that ever delightful, always imaginative, Sojo.  In a couple of weeks, it will mark six years since we met that sweet Sojo.  Light of our lives and lift to our souls. 

Sojo lives so doggone far away. Sometimes, I almost get depressed about it.  I want to hop in my car and take a quick drive over to pick her up from school or sprint over to a ball field and watch her play t-ball.  I want to go to her school and see her in a school performance or check out her creations at her school's open house.  I want to walk along for her trick-or-treat night on Halloween.  Oh my goodness, I want to have her at the table for Thanksgiving.  I want to hear about her school day and what she did for her mother on Mother's Day or her birthday.  I want to see her mother on those days.  Golly, I miss her mother too.

These things are not to be.  Her Mama and Baba have chosen international teaching careers and they travel all over the world.  Sojo started out in China, where she was born and adopted by them.  Off to Thailand and now Saudi Arabia.  So very far away.  Though I know, this Third Culture Kid is getting a broad education in so many more ways than a kid who grows up in this country, I often wonder if it balances the absence of grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins here in this country.  I also know that many of my friends who have oodles and canoodles of grandchildren scattered across town or the state or the country, might not see their grandchildren as often as we see Sojo.  We grab every moment we can with her when we can.  We travel to see them every other year around Sojo's birthday.  They come to Tucson every other Christmas.  We hope those are forever standing traditions. We know that as long as our health and money hold out, we will be traveling to see Sojo every other birthday.  Unless, there is a country where visas are an issue. And then, there is the summer.  Usually, they have eight to ten weeks to spend in Tucson and the Olympic Peninsula of Washington State.  The new school isn't as generous with time off, so this summer will be cut short.  Did you hear my groan?

We try to give Sojo the best of times and the best of us.  There is no time to be tired or grumpy.  We don't want her going home thinking we are not the best grandparents in this big wide world.  Yes, we do spoil her.  We know that she is approaching that age of reason, where we need to cut back on some of that.  We don't want her to think she has us wrapped around her little finger, even though she does.  So, we have to restrain ourselves and say "no" once in a while.  We don't like that at all and we know she doesn't either.

Having  been the center of our world for the past six years, I think there may be a wee bit of concern on her part with a new cousin in the mix.  She met him at Christmas and was pretty unimpressed.  She even asked us on SKYPE one day if we loved her less now that Augie was here.  I hope we answered in the most appropriate way for a six year old and a way that set her little heart at ease.  The best thing about love is, there is no limit on how much we have to give out.  I explained to her that a heart is full of love and as you give love to another person, it keeps filling up with more love to give.  There is no less love to give one, because there is another to give love to.  This is the same thing I tried to tell her Mama and Uncles when they thought I loved one more than the other.  There is always more love to give. 

And so, there is this Augie guy that came on the scene six years after his cousin Sojo.  Golly, we love him so much.  More than Sojo?  Not at all.  Differently, absolutely.  He has been in the same town with us since his birth and that allows us to see him grow and change every week.  He lived about 25 minutes from us until this past weekend, where he is now about 5-6 minutes from us.  The 25 minutes was great and we didn't mind hoping in the car to visit him, but this 5-6 minutes is the best.  I can pop in (invited) and spend a few minutes playing with him while his Mama and Daddy get a couple things done and then, jump in my car and stop at the grocery store and head on home.  I don't think I have gone more than 5 days without seeing him since his birth.  He knows us and loves us as much as we know and love him.  I love the way he reaches for us, hugs us and plants a sloppy kiss on our cheeks or any other place on our face that he might hit. I love that he will be right here, in nearly our backyard and we can pick him up at school, or watch him if Mommy and Daddy want a night out or an afternoon out.  I love that we can play with him in the pool, go to little pre-school shows or even be there when he graduates from pre-school and on into other grades for open houses, baseball games or swim meets or whatever his little heart desires.  Oh yes, I know they could move to another part of town and we would have to travel to wherever that might be.  And yes, I also know that they could choose to move out of the city, the state or the country.  And yes, I know that my heart would break once more. 

So what does a Popo and Nana do?  She sucks it up.  She cries a few tears and then picks herself up, dusts herself off and gives thanks to God for a life filled with all that having grandchildren brings.  The good, the bad and the Holy.  The joys, the laughter, the pride, the struggles, the distance, the closeness, the love.  Yes, most of all the love.  Be that a smile on SKYPE or a sloppy kiss, up close and personal.  I will take it all.  Every last moment of it and be thankful for all that it is. Pure JOY.   

Your Mission Should You Choose To Accept It....

I loved the original TV series of Charlie's Angels.  Maybe I just loved the glamour of the girls or the excitement of their assignments.  Imagine wearing high heels and doing what they did.  Actually, I think I just liked John Forsythe's voice and the mystery of it all.  And, I love the name Charlie, but that's another blog, someday.

So where am I going with this...

Sometime back, we were asked or maybe we just volunteered.  Who knows.  With this kind of assignment, does it really matter?

Katherine took 10 months off work to be with Augie in those early days. It was certainly a financial sacrifice and took a lot of juggling to be able to do it, but I think everyone would agree, it was the best decision ever.  Unfortunately, her school wouldn't allow her to take anymore time off and guarantee her teaching position there,so off she went mid-August to teach full-time again.  Her assignment of being away from Augie may just be tougher than ours.

Our assignment, and we chose to accept it was to have Augie 9-10 hours a day, 5 days a week for 6 1/2 weeks.  His daycare center, that has been carefully chosen, does not accept children until they are one year old and walking.  Piece of cake, we thought.

Augie arrives with Daddy and/or Mama around 6:45 am.  We have breakfast, play, read books, go outside to watch the birds, have a snack, play some more, read some more and repeat again and again.  This takes up about 10 minutes.  I think we had forgotten just how short the attention span of an 11 month old is.

To say this job is easy would do a disservice to all parents who go through these early years.  It also, would be an out and out lie. It is the toughest thing we have ever had to do...physically and mentally.  You have to put 100% into this baby thing.  It is not for the faint of heart or weak in body or spirit.  There are days when we wonder if we can do it one more day.  And then, we get a good night's sleep and we are ready again.

The reward is the warm smile we get each morning and the laughter and giggles throughout the day.  It is seeing him respond to a new toy or a book or our voice.  It is hearing new sounds come from his tiny mouth.  It is watching him clap his hands in delight or to the sound of "pat-a-cake".  It is watching him learn to navigate those first steps.

We didn't have these moments on a regular basis with Sojo.  We had to settle for Skype and summer visits to catch up with her development.  Don't get me wrong...I love Skype and am grateful beyond measure for it.  Yet, I see the difference and am grateful beyond measure for this opportunity to be with Augie in these early months.  I am grateful that his parents trust us with their most precious treasure.  We know that he will not remember these days, but our pray is that somehow we will leave a positive imprint on his little heart that he will carry with him all the days of his life.  We will tell him stories and these days will become memories through the stories, if not his own.

Yes, we are blessed beyond measure through these tiring days.  Now, I must go...he is taking a "power nap" and I should be doing the same.  I will need more strength for the next shift.

Much gratitude for his Granda who loves him as much as I do and is a tremendous source of help.  I often wonder how I raised three kids while he worked.  Oh yeah...I was 45, 42 and 35 years younger than I am today.

Thank you God for the gift of these precious grand-children of ours.

Taste of Tucson -- Summer 2013

First summer photo is always at the airport, hanging around the baggage claim area.  It was Augie's first Sojo sighting. He doesn't remember Christmas.  Nor, will he remember this one, if not for the pictures. I think he was impressed with his cousin and will look forward to seeing her again next summer when he is able to tag along after her, whether she wants him to or not.

 The annual Tucson Airport Cacti photo shot.  It's a tradition, not to be forgotten.

Sojo enjoyed sharing bubbles with Augie and showing him his first bubbles.  Maybe a new tradition starting...blowing bubbles together.  

Ever the Jedi in training, Sojo challenges Aunt Cathy to a duel.  

The traditional family photo shoot, never to be left out.  It's a "Mom" thing that everyone has seemed to finally decided isn't a bad thing.  Maybe, even something that is looked forward to.  Mt. Lemmon has definitely become a family tradition.

Sojo spent time everyday in the pool.  Sometimes, two or three times.  This is a favorite of mine.  Goggles, a toothless smile, radiating joy.

Watching your son enjoy his son's first summer, is truly a gift.  A priceless gift.

Sojo loves animals.  Especially, dogs.  Little "Matthew A" is one of the few that she can be around without an allergy attack.  He is "human" like. He has skin and hair, not hide and fur.  Perfect for this allergy prone, dog lovin' kiddo. Being able to take him for a walk is one of her very favorite things to do. 

Taking Augie for swims is a favorite summer pastime already.  Of course, it takes us all more time to get ready for the swim than we actually spend in the pool. Next year, will be different, I am sure.  

That is the end of one part of the summer.  Fortunately, there is still the Washington section to post later and for us desert rats...we still have some hot days to enjoy.  A few more weeks to swim and lots of nice days to eat outside and enjoy squeezing the last juice out of summer...on into September.

What I Love About Summertime

The summer is half over and it is hot here in the desert.  We have had temperatures of 100+ since the first day of June.  There doesn't seem to be any relief of that in the near future and after a big ole monsoon storm yesterday, we have the humidity to match.  But, I am not complaining.  I love summertime.

Here are some things I love about summertime:

• The sun shines all the time in Tucson.  Even on a monsoon day, it will find a way to peak through the clouds after the storm.
• I love monsoon storms, especially the much needed rain, but the thunder and lightening that lights up the sky is incredible, as long as it doesn't start a fire on a mountain somewhere.
• The pool is open and the water is warm.  Warm as bath water.
• I love lounging around the pool and relaxing on my float in the pool.
• The sky is the bluest blue I have ever seen. Sometimes, those storms bring in the most amazing clouds to create a blue and white mosaic across the sky.
• That mosaic sky creates the most beautiful sunrises and sunsets I have ever seen.
• I love having people over for a late afternoon swim and BBQ.
• I love being able to show Augie his first summer through my eyes and his.  First swims, first sounds of thunder, first sounds of birds singing, first sighting of birds splashing in the fountain.  A summer of firsts.
• I know that Sojo will be here soon and begin to enjoy all of these things:  Otter Pops, Popo's Veggie Soup and Meatballs, getting up early with Gong Gong (she and he are the early morning risers in this house), Netflix on TV, watching more TV than normal because she can, bouncing on her bed (yes, I know I never should have allowed that), going to Gaslight Theatre and laughing so hard at the craziness of it, swimming 2-3 times a day, everyday, watching the stars come out at night and being told that she is loved to the moon and back and that no matter how far we are from one another, we all live under the same moon.  Being together for a short time, but doing it 24/7 and squeezing as much juice out of the summer as humanly possible.
• Family time when all the chicks are in the nest along with all the chicklets, enjoying time around the pool or on the mountain. 
• Cousins having their first summer together.
• Siblings making time for one another.
• Getting that summer family picture to capture it all and hold it close.

What's not to love about summer?  When it ends...  Until then, we will enjoy each moment and be grateful for the blessing in it all.

 

  

Birthday Plans for a Seven Year Old

HERE IS ANOTHER ONE THAT HAD BEEN SITTING IN THE QUE


With our first grand-child and only grand-daughter living a world away from us, we do our very best to make a trip for every other birthday.  We were with her on her first birthday, I was there for her second, we were both there for her third and we missed number four.  Once again, we were able to spend number five with her and missed number six.  We hate missing her birthdays.  It just seems so right, to be there.  However, it isn't always possible. But...this year...is our year again and boy is it going to be a blow out year.  We are headed to Paris, France for number seven. Now who do you know that gets to spend their grand-daughter's birthday with her in Paris, France?  I find that such an amusing and just down right crazy and fun idea.  I don't even know how the idea got moving.  I think it was through discussion on the fact that maybe going all the way to Saudi wouldn't work, so why not meet in Paris during their fall break, which fell right at Sojo's birthday.  And so, the idea was conceived.  Then, the idea that we were that far, why not still go on to Saudi.  After all, we are retired and can go when we want, right? 

So we are planning the trip.  Lists, research, maps, itineraries, hotels, apartments, airplanes, trains, taxis, metros.  Kind of mind boggling, but oh so much fun.   Dreaming about walking the streets of Paris, sitting at a sidewalk café with a latte and a croissant. Hearing the hum of the busy city and seeing the twinkly night lights of this city of lights, city of love, city of fun. And hey, what about a trip to Disney in Paris for that precious 7 year old.  Yep, this sound like a great way to spend a special girl's birthday. 

And so, the plans continue with trains, planes and taxis.  It has become much more expensive than we anticipated, but then that usually happens.  And getting a Visa from Saudi Arabia had become much more difficult and convoluted than we anticipated.  However, we will not let this dull our excitement about this trip.  It is a trip of a lifetime and we will let "what will be, will be" and make the absolute best of whatever comes our way.



  

1.